Dependency and feelings: Do systems educate us well?

It can be coffee, tobacco, or other more complex ones such as hard addictions or attachment to people and goods that, in some way, have us controlled; «I am nobody without my morning coffee», or «if I run out of tobacco I die», « I do not know what I will do with my life when my mom passes», «if my wife leaves me I sink». These are only some examples, but I am sure you can identify to them to some extent.

Only You will always be by your side while you are alive. It is the only certainty. Everything else is temporary. It comes and goes. We must accept and enjoy what Life gives us at every moment without ties. Mothers die, couples change. A child can die before its creators or move to the other side of the world and life goes on! Always so wonderful… if you don’t depend on external factors for your happiness. If you eliminate, or at least do not make essential, those canes on which you rely.

While you have a cigarette and coffee, if you like them, enjoy them, but as much as you can enjoy a glass of water and a breath of fresh air the day you don’t have them. Together with yours, love them, live them, but may your happiness not depend on them. Do not depend on anything or anyone.

To find your path, there are plenty of “I can’t live without …” They are a farce of consumption. “It’s not about changing what we are, but about not clinging to anything and opening our eyes and heart.” Jack kornefield

Impermanence is a principle of harmony. When we do not fight against it, we will be in harmony with reality ». Penalty Chödrön

«Love yourself, accept yourself, be self-sufficient. Only you will always be by your side, the rest in your life is uncertain ».

Control of our feelings:

It seems that citizens of our society, need a reference where to focus their objectives. We are being educated since childhood in terms of good or bad, better or worse… but of course, this is always in the eyes of others. We are constantly comparing to other people and what they do; “Look how well they behave,” or for example; “Be good and obey the teacher like the others”, “be a good girl or boy, to not be told off” or just “you see, she eats everything and is taller and stronger than you.” And we begin to compare ourselves to measure and measure ourselves, in every way, losing the capacity to judge, to value and appreciate our own abilities, attitudes and decisions.

We largely invalidate our instinct and intuition, the hearing of our inner voice, our heart. Comparing causes pain and makes our well-being dependent on others or possessions. And yet again appears that policeman / judge who controls and judges us, guilt intensify and we experience a lack of forgiveness (with ourselves and others).

Also in this process of education in Western societies, knowledge and production become the most important thing, the goal of our lives (achieving work success, being a famous, rich person, etc.). And what about the spaces to educate and train attitudes and feelings management? Are we being taught to love ourselves, to forgive, respect, accept? Why in these societies (the developed ones), almost 25% of the population suffers from stress / depression? Why do at least a 75% of people in our society do not know what moves them and motivates them?

We have the ability to manage how external factors affects us. Through our thoughts, added to our emotions, we create our feelings. We own our attitude, deciding how to react to every situation that happens to us, with the people and living beings that surround us. Things will happen and people who like us and others that we like less will appear, but there lies within each of us the ability to get something positive and constructive from each of those events and people.

And above all, to decide how we want it to affect us (how we want to feel) since it is something that corresponds to ourselves and no one else. In the same way that we cannot create emotions in others (guilt, happiness, sadness, resentment, fear, etc.)

In life, attitudes and experiences are very important. Love, forgive, respect, share, give, receive, sincerity, decisiveness, honesty … All are attitudes and are learned mainly from experiences. And how much of this do they teach us? It seems that very little in the educational systems created by those who control the consumer society, interested in a homogeneous flock that does not go beyond the boundaries that they establish. The more idiots, with less experience in the emotional field, in the management of these attitudes, the easier to manage for those who manage the world economies and globalization for the control of the planet and its inhabitants (Bilderberg Club).

Becoming your own master is the real revolution!